Crowded in Heaven

[blackbart]

It was getting a little crowded in Heaven, so God decided to change the
>admittance policy. The new law was that in order to get into Heaven, you
>had to have a really bad day on the day that you died. The policy would
>go into effect at noon the next day.
>
>So, the next day at 12:01 the first person came to the gates of Heaven.
>The Angel at the gate, remembering the new policy, promptly asked the
>man, "Before I let you in, I need you to tell me how your day was going
>when you died."
>
>"No problem," the man said. "I came home to my 25th-floor apartment on
>my lunch hour and caught my wife having an affair. But her lover was
>nowhere in sight. I immediately began searching for him. My wife was
>half naked and yelling at me as I searched the entire apartment.
>
>Just as I was about to give up, I happened to glance out onto the
>balcony and noticed that there was a man hanging off the edge by his
>fingertips! The nerve of that guy!
>
>Well, I ran out onto the balcony and stomped on his fingers until he
>fell to the ground.
>
>But wouldn't you know it, he landed in some trees and bushes that broke
>his fall and he didn't die. This ticked me off even more.
>
>In a rage, I went back inside to get the first heavy thing I could get
>my hands on to throw at him.
>
>Oddly enough, the first thing I thought of was the refrigerator. I
>unplugged it, pushed it out onto the balcony, and tipped it over the
>side. It plummeted 25 stories and crushed him!
>
>The excitement of the moment was so great that I had a heart attack and
>died almost instantly."
>
>The Angel sat back and thought a moment. Technically, the guy did have a
>bad day. It was a crime of passion. So, the Angel announced, "OK, sir.
>Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven," and let him in.
>
>A few seconds later the next guy came up. To the Angel's surprise, it
>was Donald Trump.
>
>"Mr. Trump, before I can let you in, I need to hear about what your day
>was like when you died."
>
>Trump said, "No problem. But you're not going to believe this. I was on
>the balcony of my 26th floor apartment doing my daily exercises. I had
>been under a lot of pressure so I was really pushing hard to relieve my
>stress. I guess I got a little carried away, slipped, and accidentally
>fell over the side!
>
>Luckily, I was able to catch myself by the fingertips on the balcony
>below mine. But all of a sudden this crazy man comes running out of his
>apartment, starts cussing, and stomps on my fingers. Well, of course I
>fell. I hit some trees and bushes at the bottom, which broke my fall, so
>I didn't die right away.
>
>As I'm laying there face up on the ground, unable to move and in
>excruciating pain, I see this guy push his refrigerator of all things
>off the balcony. It falls the 25 floors and lands on top of me, killing
>me instantly."
>
>The Angel is quietly laughing to himself as Trump finishes his story. "I
>could get used to this new policy," he thinks to himself. "Very well,"
>the Angel announces. "Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven," and he lets
>Trump enter
>
>A few seconds later, Bill Clinton comes up to the gate. The Angel is
>almost too shocked to speak. Thoughts of assassination and war pour
>through the Angel's head. Finally he says, "Mr. President, please tell
>me what it was like the day you died."
>
>Clinton says, "OK, picture this. I'm naked, inside a refrigerator!"
>

[buddyjh]

slick willy at it again

[picklefixer]

Thats just funny