baked beans

[DRFORMAT1]

Baked Beans - This is hilarious!

(This one is much too cute not to share. Enjoy! Be sure
to grab a tissue; I think you'll be laughing so hard you'll cry!)

One day I met a sweet gentlema n and fell in love. When it became
apparent that we would marry, I made the supreme
sacrifice and gave up beans.

Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on
the way home from work. Since I lived in the countryside I called my
husband and told him that I would be late be cause I had to walk
home. On my way, I passed by a small diner and the odor of baked beans
was more than I could stand. With miles to walk, I figured that I would
walk off any ill effects by the time I reached home, so I stopped at
the diner and before I knew it, I had consumed three large orders of
baked beans.

All the way home, I made sure that I released all the
gas.

Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see me and
exclaimed delightedly: 'Darling I have a surprise for dinner
tonight.'

He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the
dinner table I took a seat and just as he was about to remove my
blindfold, the telephone rang . He made me promise not to touch the
blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call..

The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me
and the pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my
husband was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to
one leg and let one go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a
fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill.
I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me
vigorously.

Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three
more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage.

Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in
the other room, I went on like this for another few minutes.

The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the
telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom, I quickly fann
ed the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and
folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with
myself.

My face must have been the picture of innocence when my
husband returned, apologizing for taking so long. He asked me if
I had peeked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not.

At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve
dinner guests seated around the table chorused: 'Happy Birthday!'

I fainted !!!!!!!!!!!!